Our Beaded Bracelet Keepsake Waiting List 9/30/13

Our current waiting list for beaded bracelet keepsake orders from Fruit Of The Womb Angels

Current as of Monday, September 30th 2013

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List - angel baby name(s) - USA

Grace, Blake Nicole

Lizzy and Sis

Mariah

Jake Edward Carey

7 weeks, France

2 angels, Dorman

Angel Cobee Bell

My'Kel

Journey Leonard and Shelby Elizabeth

Chloe Danielle and Zoe Grace

Baby Stidham

Andrew Milan Martin

42 weeks, Higareda

Amera

Michael L. Betta

Masen James Fritzler

Harmony, Serenity

Elijah Alexander Larsen

Christopher Bryon and David Russel

Lane

Tiffany Nicole

Tovi Wren Smith

Richie Orion Smith

Jayarie

Kaleigh Joyce Henson

ShyAnn Elizabeth Laudrey

Erika Renee Pfeifer

Callie Murrell

Layla, Jayden

Keegan Dennis Taft

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List - fatal diagnosed pregnancy, name(s) - USA

Raylee Jo

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List - angel baby name(s) - outside USA

Chloe Anne Battershell

Nevaeh Elizabeth and Naomi Rose Battershell

(Currently unable to ship outside the USA,

Hopefully in the future we will be international)

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Shipped Keepsakes List

Gabriel

Treave Franklin Clark

Baby Finley

three babies, Watson

Baby Odom

Robbie and Jake

Tristin Angel

Hope Noel, Lucas David, June Bug

Elektra Carmen Sullivan

Nehemiah

Amy Heather Mandelbaum

Makenzi Dawn Shouse

Emma Star Moore

Jameson

Elijah

Lillian Rain and Liam River

Maggie Rose

Ronan Michael Mullens

Donna Kay Chrisley

4 months, Magner

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Pending to Ship Keepsakes List

Aimee Skyler Williams

Aiden Sifuentes

Austin Bradley Togneri

Katelynn Brooke Tipton

Mateo Luke Rochford

Baby Sexton

Spencer John Osterhout

Timothy William Jr.

Shiloah Rathmann

Tanya Jackson

All Of A Sudden

All of a sudden my l life, my struggles, my problems, and my infertility doesn't seem that important. I still have time..

Today I learned that a good friend of mine I haven't seen in quite some time is going through an intense chemotherapy program that will last several weeks. She and her husband have a 4 week old beautiful baby girl and a 3 year old son. She has her entire life ahead of her and my eyes just want to tear up and cry for her because I'm heartbroken that she has to go through this at such a young age. She will need to stay strong and believe, she and I both have to know that she will beat this!

The tears just don't want to stay in my throat or my eyes. I can't imagine being in her position but she needs to do what she can to come home to her family.

Much love to you my friend!!!! <3

Stolen Names, Dear Apple and Banana

Dear Apple and Banana, 

I know I don't write to you girls often enough, I'm sorry for that. Your momma has been so busy helping others, honoring the memories of so many precious and much wanted babies gone too soon. 

Yesterday I learned of someone who had taken your unique names and used them for a recent loss of their own. This was done without asking me how I felt, without any update about having a loss, without anything at all. Just a request on a graphic with your names on it from the same page I have been requesting graphics from since the beginning of this year. I was hurt, I was angry, I still feel a little bit of both.

I'm sorry that I couldn't protect you babies. I'm sorry that someone decided to steal your names. They didn't explain how they came to name their babies your names, just that I was being rude to question and and that "it is a free country", that she "is entitled to name her Angels what ever she would like". She said I was being rude but in fact I felt that her response to me was being that, and by not answering what I had asked.

Had she asked me baby girls I may not have minded so much, I may have felt honored, although I would have asked for her to name her 2nd child something different than banana because that name is very special to your daddy and I.

Both your names are so very special to us. Your names have a story behind it, our first ultrasound and seeing your tiny baby circles with beating flickers of heartbeats, we will never forget how that moment made us feel.

A year ago our lives were so very different, you babies were growing and each week was an amazing experience to see you both. Our hearts ache that you're gone, that all we have left of you are memories and our keepsakes to remember you by.

Please send us lots of signs and don't be too upset that your momma is hurt and offended by this. There are things more important that this. The support group here and the charity will go on in your memory and your lives will be honored. Everything that I do, I do for you my loves. You made me a mother, thank you so much for the gift you gave me.

Watch over your parents and send us some baby dust and good luck so we can conceive a rainbow baby brother or sister for you. We dream of having an earthly baby and hope that this time in our lives next year will be filled with celebration.

Momma loves you both so so very much, forever and ever!!! Our snow angels, our beautiful butterflies, our shining stars, our fruit of the womb, our Apple Marie and Banana Lee.  

Hugs and kisses baby girls.

Love,
Your Momma and page admin to Fruit Of The Womb, TTTS Angels and Fruit Of The Womb Angels, Evelyn Schwenke

My Tangible Peace and Tayler's Treasures & Blessings from Heaven, Our shared story.

My Tangible Peace makes some beautiful sculptures in memory of much wanted babies gone too soon. So today I decided to share our story on a fb page that is offering big giveaway, a chance to win one of these precious sculptures by My Tangible Peace. Thank you so much to Tayler's Treasures & Blessings from Heaven for this amazing opportunity!

Without further ado, our story that I shared.

"Our twins were our all and everything. After about eight years of trying to conceive, most of all naturally we decided to try something different and elected for an IVF cycle that would happen in August 2012.

We conceived that IVF cycle, so very lucky and by September we learned we would be having identical twins. Our hearts were filled with happiness and the future felt so bright. During that first ultrasound with they were being labeled baby A and baby B I remember turning to my husband and saying to him with a smile, "baby A and baby B, it's our little apple and banana". After that day the names just kind of stuck.

With scares here and there, hyperstimulation, a cyst rupture, bleeding and being told we had a "threatened miscarriage", we were fearful for our precious little babies. By November our fears were resting, that period of time to be cautious was passing us by and we got to enjoy watching both our babies grow with each of our biweekly and then weekly ultrasounds. We learned we were having identical twin girls, we were on top of the world.

Finally by our December ultrasound we learned there could be a problem, possible of having TTTS, which is twin twin transfusion syndrome. Our hearts were heavy and we were so worried for our babies. We moved forward that week and scheduled immediately for our girls to have a laser surgery hoping it would separate the connected placenta and they would have equal nutrition. The surgery went well but now know that the micro vessels are believed to have not been all lasered apart, you can't see micro vessels.

On December 9th we learned that our baby A had died, her heart was no longer beating and she was still. The night would be a struggle for baby B and myself with a bad allergic drug reaction and little sleep. The next morning on December 10th our baby B's heart rate had dropped and by that afternoon although her heart had flickers of color through out it but it was no longer beating, she was not moving, she too was gone.

I would not labor them, not right away, daily contractions, and 18 days later induced on December 28th 2012. After about 17 hours of labor and back labor they were born. At 11:20am our Apple Marie was born at 5.6 ounces, then at 11:30am our Banana Lee was born at 7.4 ounces. Our twins were beautiful and looked so much like their daddy.

Almost was rushed into emergency surgery because the placenta did not want to be birthed, too much blood loss almost had a d&c and blood transfusion but with one last attempt everything was born.

That is a short story about the girls. Since that time I have created a page in their memory for support and graphics called Fruit Of The Womb, TTTS Angels, a charity called Fruit Of The Womb Angels, a website for the charity, a blog where I write my thoughts at blogger and where I host giveaways; and I only plan to do more things in our twins memory to honor their lives. Everything I do is for our twins, they hold my heart and made me a mother.

Thank you for letting me share our story. I love My Tangible Peace and hope to some day own a beautiful keepsake in our twins likeness. <3 "

New Winners for I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway!

Congratulations to our two new winners for our I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway!!!

SaraLyn Cooper, mother to Bailee Ann Cooper

Jerrica Magner, mother to Baby Butterfly, and Baby Magner

Our winners will have 48 hours to contact via email to claim their winnings.

Due to an invalid entry SaraLyn won our light brown TeddyBear

One last re-draw was done after sorting through to make sure all entries were valid

Jerrica Magner has won our dark brown TeddyBear with care

These are the results from our re-draw and post about our redraw can be found here http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/redraw-for-our-i-love-you-teddybear.html

Our link to our original post about having a possible redraw http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/possible-redraw.html

Our link to our original post about our two winners http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/congrats-to-our-2-winners-i-love-you.html

These are the new two winners from our giveaway, original posting http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/08/i-love-you-teddybear-giveaway-4.html

Thank you to everyone who helped us reach our goal of 500 likes by August 30th 2013 on our Fruit Of The Womb TTTS Angels facebook page. Feel free to share our facebook page with others and help us continue to reach new like goals while we create keepsakes, graphics, have giveaways and honor the lives of our twins.

Redraw for our I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway in the morning

We will be having a redraw for our I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway in the morning as I did not hear from either our winners all last week after several notifications and emails to reach them. Our original list of those who entered will be used and we will have two new winners. Our winners will have 48 hours to contact me to claim their winnings. If I am not contacted by that time we will be taking down this giveaway in it's entirety and will wait at least one month before having another.

An official announcement with our two new winners will be posted in the morning today. Stay tuned and if you win, please reply via email as quickly as possible. I have never had to have a re-draw before and it hurts my heart that I have to do something like this after the amount of work that was put into the creation of this giveaway and the lovely care packages that will be traveling along with our teddy bears.

Take care and goodnight.

Our link to our original post about our giveaway http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/08/i-love-you-teddybear-giveaway-4.html

Our link to our original post about our two winners http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/congrats-to-our-2-winners-i-love-you.html

Our link to our original post about having a possible redraw http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/possible-redraw.html

Possible Redraw

On Monday we had our drawing for our I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway and we had two winners. Usually I receive replies within the next day if not the first. 

I'm disappointed to say I have not heard back from either our winners yet. I have now sent out three emails and if I do not hear back by this Saturday we will have a redraw. 

This was such a huge giveaway and big deal reaching our likes goal honoring the memory of our twins. I hope everything is  ok personally with our two winners but on the same hand they knew when our giveaway ended on Sunday and we always have drawing the next day. 

Here is out link to our giveaway post congratulating our two winners. 

http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/09/congrats-to-our-2-winners-i-love-you.html?m=1

To our two winners, 

Tasha Pisani and Melissa Anders

Please email me at fruitofthewombtttsangels@gmail.com to claim by Saturday! If I don't hear from you there will be a redraw Sunday morning. 

Our Beaded Bracelet Keepsake Waiting List

Our current waiting list for beaded bracelet keepsake orders from Fruit Of The Womb Angels

Current as of Tuesday, September 10th 2013

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List - angel baby name(s) - USA

Aimee Skyler Williams

Aiden Sifuentes

Austin Bradley Togneri

Katelynn Brooke Tipton

Mateo Luke Rochford

Baby Sexton

Spencer John Osterhout

Timothy Williams Jr. 

Shiloah Rathmann

Adilynn Caroline Jackson

Grace, Blake Nicole

Lizzy and Sis

Mariah

Jake Edward Carey

7 weeks, France

2 angels, Dorman

Angel Cobee Bell

My'Kel

Journey Leonard and Shelby Elizabeth

Chloe Danielle and Zoe Grace

Baby Stidham

Andrew Milan Martin

42 weeks, Higareda

Amera

Michael L. Betta

Masen James Fritzler

Harmony, Serenity

Baby Magner

Elijah Alexander Larsen

Christopher Bryon and David Russel

Lane

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List - fatal diagnosed pregnancy, name(s) - USA

Raylee Jo

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List - angel baby name(s) - outside USA

Chloe Anne Battershell

Nevaeh Elizabeth and Naomi Rose Battershell

(Currently unable to ship outside the USA,

Hopefully in the future we will be international)

Update to Fruit Of The Womb Angels

For our charity I plan to use the blog for our updates, giveaways and now plan to use it for keepsake requests waiting lists. This way everyone who submits orders knows we have received their request for a beaded bracelet in memory of their much wanted angel baby gone too soon. 

The following post will have our current full list for our open charity orders. 

New Updates On FOTWA!

New updates on our charity website Fruit Of The Womb Angels! Be sure to check it out!

Now standard approximate wait time to receive your beaded bracelet order will be three months. This is due to amount of orders, custom creation, need to gather further information, and that we also have occasional giveaways and weekly graphics on our support page Fruit Of The Womb TTTS Angels on facebook.

Hopefully everyone understands the reason for the wait and appreciates the time and love that goes into the creation of their keepsake. It's been an honor being able to create these beaded bracelets in memory of so many precious, much wanted babies gone too soon.

Upcoming, our BIG NEWS! This year we plan to begin having local donations. Setting in motion plans to donate care packages with information about baby loss and bereaved support to local hospitals in the St. Louis area this fall and winter.

http://www.fruitofthewombangels.org/Updates.html Here is the link for our current website updates, we also have a new photo in our keepsake photography section of our last shipped beaded bracelets.

Congrats To Our 2 Winners, I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway!

We have our 2 winners!

Tasha Pisani and Melissa Anders!!!!!

Congrats to you and thank you to all who entered our I Love You TeddyBear Giveaway!

All emails have been sent out, please be sure to view all the options and reply to your email when you have time. Emails will go out again once your TeddyBear with care is complete and being shipped. :)

Below is a screen shot from our giveaway with our list of winners!

These are the winners from our giveaway, original posting http://thoughtsofanangelmommyfotwa.blogspot.com/2013/08/i-love-you-teddybear-giveaway-4.html

Thank you to everyone who helped us reach our goal of 500 likes by August 30th 2013 on our Fruit Of The Womb TTTS Angels facebook page. Feel free to share our facebook page with others and help us continue to reach new like goals while we create keepsakes, graphics, have giveaways and honor the lives of our twins.

The Aching Heart

Sometimes your heart hurts so very much you feel the pain is too much to bear. That feeling is because of the love you hold in your heart. At times it may feel like you're breaking apart, worry not as the scar will hold you together. You miss them, they are not here to hold near you. You are not alone. On the wings of butterflies, through snow flake kisses, from the rain drop tears, a beautiful rainbow, a sparkle in the night's star lit sky; they will send you their sign. 

This message is for all of us who have, are and will feel this pain. It took time to realize why my heart must ache so. It may hurt but when it does I'm reminded of how much love I hold inside. Our children are no longer with us, but because they remain in our hearts they will live on forever. 

Held and loved all their life, our beautiful, identical twin daughters Apple Marie and Banana Lee. Their memory lives on, everything I do is for them. To live and continue forward, I live for you because you babies can not. Your lives and memory will forever be remembered. 

Today remembering and missing our twins. They made me a mother. Just hoping we are blessed with our rainbow because I have so much love to give. This may be what heals my heart and helps me right now but I feel my true calling in this life is to be a mother. To have that moment taken too soon and to wait that much longer, it is unfair and bittersweet. I long to have what so many have. A baby, that is what we always have dreamed of. There is no questioning if they are wanted. 

Someday it will happen. One way or another. Much love to you all! 

I Do Have Feelings, Facebook Thoughts..

My heart does hurt inside when I'm misunderstood or assumed to be something I'm not. What I am now these days is honest, thoughtful, truthful, mindful, and most importantly aware. I try always to live a true life and not use false speech.

On facebook I've been assumed to be a few things most recently.. It bothers me but there isn't much I can do about it.

What is frustrating is that the organization I highly support banned me apparently over a personal conversation about something we just couldn't agree to disagree on. My last message was never replied to but apparently I was banned from their charity page as so I can't have an opinion or share my support any longer.

I still like their page, my page still likes their page, but if anyone ever sees or replies to this; should I still support them after being banned over a disagreement?

I would never do that to anyone, nor would ever say anything hurtful publicly, especially using their name or facebook page. That is not how I roll and if they assume I would go after them and try to publicly out or hurt them then it turns out they don't know me at all.

Warning others about bad vendors or fake angel mommies or fake angel groups or pages is one thing, but to just go after a person or page just because I don't like them.. I'm not about that. I don't appreciate being assumed to be something I am not.

One Day, You

'One Day, You'

One day
Hopefully sooner than later
Our dreams will come true
Finally you'll enter our lives
We'll have a future

Some day
Wanting it now and not never
Wishes and I love you's
Singing you lullabies
When you're living inside of the womb

Sweet, precious baby
Please make our hearts brighten from the blues
Beautiful, rainbow baby
You're just a fantasy right now while we hope for you
Moving forward, the past a memory, we dream for you

One day, there will be you.

Written by Evelyn Schwenke (c) Thursday, September 5th 2013

Random Thoughts and Poetry

So many emotions trapped inside
Wondering, waiting, eating me alive
I wish and dream but no surprise
That future left, it's gone and died



Just no idea what the future holds but what I do know is that the future for our twins left almost nine months ago. Difficult to imagine it was that long ago and at this rate we may have a three or four month old or olds..

I think about our daughter Banana Lee and if the surgery for their TTTS had been successful would we had known to watch one child grow up, or would both children of had a chance.

Once our Apple Marie passed away Nana was all we had and we didn't want to let go of her. I should have known something wasn't right.. She wasn't moving around and showing off for the ultrasounds.

Perhaps when there was trouble that's when the fun stopped. The girls were so close together, head to head and it is almost like Nana was reaching out to Apple and speaking her name while pointing with her last breath, "I'm coming sister..", and then she left too...

The images of our babies will always be in my heart and my memory. Looked so much like their daddy with their mommy's jawline. I still try to imagine what our beautiful daughter's would have looked like fully grown, but my mind won't let me see it.

I dream of our rainbow baby but worried about the future. I need a future with little to no stress, to relax, and once it all happens, positivity.

That's all I can think to write tonight. Forever hopeful.

Wonder

Sometimes I just wonder...

Honestly that's about all I have to say.

Heading to bed after a long day and what will inevitably be a long week. Lots to do.

I Dream Of You

'I Dream Of You'

I dream of you
Sweet little girls
Are you in heaven twirling your curls?

Though time was short
Your lives so brief
Are you with Buddha?
Do you have enlightenment and peace?

I wonder if you've been reborn
Will we meet again?
Some day I'm sure

At times my heart breaks inside
Because you passed away, you died
Selfish, I didn't want to let go
Those moments, so cherished, so missed, so loved

Who knows where you are or where you will be
All I know is that you hold my heart and the key
You unlocked so much love I didn't know I had inside
That's why it was so hard to say goodbye

Forever and ever you'll be in our hearts
Loving you always, never to part


Written by Evelyn Schwenke (c) Tuesday, September 3rd 2013

Unknowing This Future

Unknowing this future. So many memories of our twins from last year and have no idea what is ahead of us. Hopeful for our rainbow baby, the child you have after loss and that our year next year will have a happier ending. <3